Monday, October 11, 2010

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Henry

James raised his right eyebrow. He then pointed to the wheelie bin outside the cabin with both eyebrows raised.

John, realising his mistake, made a mildly disappointed expression with his face and gestured to the corpse of a dead girl lying on the floor between them, his arms held out at maximum width.

James nodded and brought his left hand under his chin, thoughtfully.

James began to mime, indicating a large, bulky object with his hands, then prentending to pick up the girl's corpse and drop it into the object, he finished with a grinding arm action, reminiscent of 'The Hustle'.

John's face lit up with recognition. He began miming in excited confirmation, quite enjoying the game caution demanded they play. His palm facing the ground, he put his hand just above his eyes. Then he pointed sternly at the door.

James recognised this as John miming 'like Fargo?' and nodded vigorously.

Down the road from the cabin in which our protagonists have been gesticulating, an unmarked van is parked. Inside the van, there are a number of monitors, speakers and two CIA agents. One of the CIA agents turned to the other and raised a confused left eyebrow.

Suzie

I will begin with my death. I died, suddenly finding myself at the end of a long queue. The queue lead into a distant abyss and all around me was darkness. I was in the 'birth line', awaiting my re-entry into life. I was born again. As a very bright newborn, I stumbledupon a micro-autobiographical challenge on WEbook and decided that 73 words was precisely enough to express my very short life, thus far.

Wile E. Coyote

7:00am - Have a good stretch, having slept the night slumped on a rock.

8:00am - Continue my endless search, my desperate quest, for something to EAT!

9:00am - Reflect on the fact that although I can't speak, I'm quite adept at writing signs and schedules.

9:30am - Pay numerous medical bills: Dentist (eating too many tin cans, rocks and loose foliage), Orthopedic surgeon (setting and putting casts around every bone in my body) and Psychiatrist (continue exploring my association with the road runner and my late mother.)

10:30am - Purchase a number of extravagant devices from ACME (don't forget to swipe your loyalty card!)

12:00pm - Set up an ingenious contraption, making sure to ignore the dangerous possibilities of interacting with the device yourself.

1:00pm - Wipe off the explosion residue from your fur and begin constructing your second contraption.

3:30pm - Finish hoisting the heavy object to a great height; secure it in a delicate manner.

4:00pm - Waddle off screen as quickly as your pancake-like body can manage.

4:30pm - Think hard, then arrive at your most dastardly plan yet, yes, order those rocket propelled (insert device name here).

5:00pm - Ignore the stuttering pig, go back home to your rock, laptop: jobs.com